Monday, March 25, 2013

Holy Week--Holy blunder

I am missing the old days when we went to mass every single Sunday together, with granny and sometimes grandpa too.  It was a lot of effort to get ourselves there on time, but it was a great feeling in my heart.  Yesterday, I got to church, our new church, only to realize it was Palm Sunday.  All the years I spent teaching my kids, and preparing for Holy Week, in anticipation for Easter.  I nearly burst into tears as I realized....I had fallen asleep, forgotten..my head so wrapped up in cancer, chemo, steroids, hockey outing...
Just when I was almost proud that I "made it to church" with 3 of the 5....I am sitting there in disbelief that time and life float around me, and I grasp at so few things in it....

Luke will try to go to Easter service next week.  I am pretty nervous as a lot of kids and adults there are quite often sick.  We made it last year, but every day we decide on the day of.....

In early April Gabriel is doing his First Communion.  It was a HUGE big deal two years ago when Frannie did hers.  I feel like this time, it's a small big deal.  Not the meaning, just the celebratory part.  So much of our family and friends has changed, and faded away over the last 16 months...I don't know how to explain.  For Rebekah's baptism, we ended up having 3 guests.  It's a lot of reasons, and a lot of unknowns.  I hope for Gabriel's sake, that he feel every bit as much love in his small celebration as Frannie did.  I hope too that Luke can attend safely.  We will see.

Luke has not been to church much at all since dx, but we try and have him keep up his faith at home. 

I hope and pray that this Holy Week proves somewhat more Holy and less blundery...I must add that Jacob celebrates his 3rd birthday on Good Friday this week.  Pretty special.

1 comment:

Robina said...

Ah, I wish I would have know it was Jacob's birthday on Friday :( I would have gotten him a little something special.